In the second aliyah of Parashat Lech Lecha, Avraham Avinu goes down to Mitzrayim together with his wife, and he takes precautions. He knows his wife is a beautiful woman, and he says to her: הִנֵּה נָא יָדַעְתִּי כִּי אִשָּׁה יְפַת מַרְאֶה אָתְּ, “I know that you are a beautiful woman,” and therefore, אִמְרִי נָא אֲחֹתִי אָתְּ לְמַעַן יִיטַב לִי בַעֲבוּרֵךְ וְחָיְתָה נַפְשִׁי בִּגְלָלֵךְ (Bereishit 12:11, 13).
But when he arrives in Mitzrayim, the Mitzrim have a different outlook. They do not say she is beautiful; they say she is very beautiful: וַיִּרְאוּ הַמִּצְרִים אֶת הָאִשָּׁה כִּי יָפָה הִוא מְאֹד (12:14). Why did they need to add that word, “very”? If we understand why, we can learn a lesson for ourselves.
The Diamond Expert
Take a parable of a person who goes to shop for a diamond. He walks into the diamond store and they show him one for five thousand, one for fifteen thousand, one for twenty-five thousand. They all look pretty and nice to him; he does not see a difference. But a person who is an expert in diamonds, who deals with diamonds every day, knows the difference. He tells you: this is a nice diamond, this one is very beautiful, this one is gorgeous.
The same thing here. People who are continuously involved with mundane things, with the things of this world, see the difference between a woman who is pretty and a woman who is very beautiful, because that is what they are involved with all the time. It is like a person who goes to buy a car. To him, that is a good car, a nice car; he would not know the difference between this car and that car. But a person who is involved with cars knows: “Yes, that’s a good car, but this one is excellent.”
A Person Is Measured by What He Praises
So what should we be involved with? What should excite us? The pasuk says, וְאִישׁ לְפִי מַהֲלָלוֹ (Mishlei 27:21): who you are is defined by what you praise. If you praise pretty women, that is what you are involved with. If you praise cars, that is what you are involved with. If you praise Torah, if you praise someone who is involved with yirat shamayim and who prays well, that is what you are involved with.
This is especially important when it comes to what we show our family, our wives and our children. What do we praise at the Shabbat table? What do we praise when we are driving and see something beautiful? “Oh, look at that car! Look at this beautiful car!” That is what we praise, and so that is the idea they absorb. Ish lefi mahalalo: that is who you are, that is what you are involved with, and you will know the difference between a good car and an excellent car.
Or, when we see an avrech walking down the street, we say, “Wow, look at this tzaddik.” A rabbi passes: “There’s a rabbi walking down the street.” We see a Rosh Yeshiva: “Wow, look at this Rosh Yeshiva.” If we praise the right things, if we praise Torah and mitzvot, if before Sukkot we say, “Look at this beautiful etrog, but this one is even more beautiful,” then that is what we are involved with. It affects us, it affects our children, and it affects everyone around us.
Based on Rabbi Shay Tahan’s class “Shnayim Yomi – Lech Lecha – Avraham Said Sarah Is Beautiful, The Egyptians Said Very Beautiful. Why?” (Parashat Lech Lecha): watch the class.
