Google decided that the definition of a Jew is “someone who bargains in a miserly and petty way.” After they wrote such a thing, they got flagged by many, and they removed it with a post of apology. But we need to understand: why is it that the goyim have looked at us with such a stigma for so many generations, that a Jew is stingy, somebody miserly? Why is this the way the goy looks at us? It’s such a stereotype. And we can learn something from our parasha.
Yaakov Avinu tells his children that he is to be buried in Eretz Canaan, in the grave אֲשֶׁר כָּרִיתִי לִי (Bereishit 50:5). What does kariti mean? Rashi brings the Midrash: שֶׁנָּטַל יַעֲקֹב כָּל כֶּסֶף וְזָהָב שֶׁהֵבִיא מִבֵּית לָבָן וְעָשָׂה אוֹתוֹ כְּרִי וְאָמַר לְעֵשָׂו טֹל זֶה בִּשְׁבִיל חֶלְקְךָ בַּמְּעָרָה. He took all the gold and silver he brought from Lavan’s house, piled it up in front of Esav, and told him: take this for your share in the cave. You see from here, says the Orchot Tzaddikim, how generous Yaakov Avinu was.
But on the other hand, we have other places where we see that Yaakov Avinu was very careful with money. After he crosses the river with his family, he realizes he forgot a few jugs, and he goes back to get them: וַיִּוָּתֵר יַעֲקֹב לְבַדּוֹ (32:25). Rashi says שָׁכַח פַּכִּים קְטַנִּים וְחָזַר עֲלֵיהֶם, and Chazal learn from here לַצַּדִּיקִים שֶׁחָבִיב עֲלֵיהֶם מָמוֹנָם יוֹתֵר מִגּוּפָם (Chullin 91a). Yaakov Avinu, one of the wealthiest people of his time, crosses back over the river for a few small jugs. Why? We see from here that he’s very tight with money.
Says the Orchot Tzaddikim: you need to differentiate between kinds of spending. When one spends on spiritual things, such as mitzvot, learning Torah, or tuition for your children’s Torah learning, one needs to spend to the fullest of his ability. So much so that the Zohar says, in Parashat Terumah, that if one bargains over a mitzvah, the light of that mitzvah doesn’t shine. A person needs to pay fully for a mitzvah. That’s why the Arizal, when he went to buy something for a mitzvah, would give his wallet to the seller and tell him: take as much as you wish. That is when you buy something spiritual, just as Yaakov Avinu went to buy his share in the Me’arah, which was a spiritual thing.
But when you buy things that are not spiritual, for yourself or for your entertainment, when you go to a restaurant or on a vacation or buy something for your own needs, there you don’t need to spend mindlessly. You don’t need to spend without boundaries. You have to ask: do I need to spend all that money? If not, don’t spend extra. Spend whatever’s needed.
And that is the chiluk, the difference between a Jew and a goy. A very, very fine difference. The goy looks at the world as the primary thing he lives for. His entertainment, his enjoyment; everything is about that, and therefore he wants to spend as much as he can on his enjoyment, his entertainment, the worldly things. A Jew, on the other hand, spends more money on what’s really important: the spiritual side of the world, honoring Hashem, learning Torah, mitzvot. When it comes to other things, there the Jew is tighter. There he’s ready to bargain.
So when a goy sees a Jew bargaining over the things that are important to the goy, the enjoyment of the world, entertainment, going to a restaurant, he asks: why aren’t you spending as much as I do? Why are you looking at the menu trying to find what’s cheaper? The goy doesn’t understand that. He looks at the Jew and sees somebody stingy. That’s where the stereotype could be coming from.
So yes, we are being looked at by the goyim in such a negative light. But the truth is, it’s because we look at the world through totally different eyeglasses, a totally different way of viewing the world. That’s why the goy sees the Jew that way, although the Jew is really much more elevated and spends his money in the right place. Shabbat Shalom.
Based on Rabbi Shay Tahan’s class “Vayechi. Google Definition Of A Jew: Someone Who Bargains In A Misery & Petty Way.” (Parashat Vayechi): watch the class.
